What Motherhood Taught Me About Time, Identity And Boundaries
Becoming a mum has been one of the biggest transformations of my life. It has been beautiful and challenging at the same time. It has also given me crystal clear clarity about the kind of woman I want to be.
In this episode of the She Trusts Herself podcast, I share what early motherhood has taught me about my identity, my time and my boundaries, and how I am learning to honour myself in this new season.
Being A Mum And Being Yourself
I love being a mum, but it is not the whole of who I am. I knew going into motherhood that I wanted to exist outside of my relationship with my baby. That might not resonate with everyone and that is okay. For me, motherhood is a part of my identity, not the entire thing.
While on maternity leave, I became a certified human design reader, spoke at events as a guest speaker, started writing my third book, launched this podcast and even got my skipper's ticket. All of these things reminded me that I still have my own goals and desires outside of motherhood.
Navigating Feeling Time Poor
Since returning to work, I have struggled with feeling time poor. My commitments and my desires do not always match the time I have available. I realised I could either stay stuck in frustration or accept that this is my current season.
Right now, I am experimenting with doing at least one thing for myself each day. It might be a workout, a creative project, preparing for a human design reading or creating content. I cannot do everything in one day, but I can still make progress.
It is not about moving at the speed I wish I could. It is about recognising that I am still moving forward and that is enough for now.
Choosing Presence With The People You Love
Another big lesson has been the importance of presence. I do not want my son to feel like he has to compete with my phone or my work for my attention.
My husband and I used to eat dinner on the couch while watching TV. Now that our baby is awake during meal times, we have chosen to eat together at the dining table. We want him to feel our attention and be part of that moment.
Small choices like this matter. If we are always half present, we can miss the little moments that become the big memories, like the first time he clapped at dinner.
Stronger Boundaries And Protecting Your Time
Motherhood has also made me much clearer and firmer with my boundaries. My time and energy feel more precious than ever. I am more comfortable saying no to things that do not feel like the right investment.
You do not have to wait until you have a baby to realise that your time is a sacred resource. Once you spend it, you cannot get it back. The more you start saying yes to yourself, the more aligned your life will feel, even if it means disappointing other people sometimes.
Actionable Tips From This Season Of Motherhood
- Do one thing for yourself each day: Even a small action can help you feel more like you.
- Accept your current season: Acknowledge that your time and capacity might look different right now and that it will not always be this way.
- Be present on purpose: Choose specific moments, like meals or playtime, where you put your phone away and focus fully on your loved ones.
- Review your routines: Ask if your current habits support the kind of parent, partner and person you want to be.
- Strengthen your boundaries: Say no to commitments that drain you so you can say yes to what truly matters.
- Remember you are more than one role: You are allowed to have goals, dreams and interests outside of motherhood or any other identity.
Listen And Go Deeper
🎧 Listen to the full episode on Spotify here:
She Trusts Herself - Episode 7
🎧 Listen to the full episode on YouTube here:
She Trusts Herself - Episode 7
📚 Explore my books and offerings to support you in this season of life:
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